The Marketing Autopsy · $97 · credits back to $0

You can feel the marketing's off. This tells you exactly where — and what it's costing you.

Seven forensic questions on your actual business, graded, no punches pulled. The most honest read on your marketing you'll get anywhere — for less than a decent dinner, and it credits back in full if you go on to relaunch.

20 relaunches a week·Human signed-off·Credits back within 14 days

You've built something real. You just can't tell why it isn't landing.

Six years of graft. Customers who rave about you. Work you're proud of. And marketing you're slightly embarrassed by — a website you'd rather not send people to, a list you've never emailed, a presence that makes you look smaller than you are.

You know it's costing you. You just can't see where, or how much. The leaks are invisible from the inside — you're too close to your own business to see it the way a stranger does. And the stranger is the one deciding whether to ring you or the loud bloke down the road.

That not-knowing is the expensive bit. You can't fix a leak you can't find.

The Autopsy finds them. All of them.

Seven questions — the sharp end of the same 45 an agency charges a full discovery day for. Run forensically on your numbers, your customers' words, your actual competitive position. Not a template. Not a generic scan that says the same thing to everyone.

No call to sit through. No pitch. Pay, answer, get the forensic read back.

Why $97 — and why it credits back to nothing

Straight answer, because you're right to ask.

$97 is low enough that finding out what's wrong isn't a decision you have to agonise over — and high enough that you'll actually do the questions properly, which is the whole point. A free audit gets skimmed. A paid one gets answered honestly.

It credits back in full against a full Relaunch72 within 14 days. So if the autopsy convinces you to rebuild the lot, the $97 comes straight off — it's cost you nothing. And if it doesn't, you've still got the most honest read on your marketing you'll find anywhere, and you owe us nothing further.

That's the deal. $97 to find out, free if you fix it, no strings if you don't.

Who signs it off

Every autopsy — like every relaunch — carries Martin Howard's sign-off. Not a support ticket. Not a bot generating the same report for everyone. A human reading your business and telling you the truth about it. If it reads generic, it doesn't ship.

— Martin Howard, founder, Relaunch72

Straight answers

Is this just ChatGPT with extra steps?
No. A tool hands everyone the same generic mush — which is the exact problem you're paying to diagnose. The autopsy is seven deliberate questions run on your specifics, then read by a human before it reaches you. The human gate is the whole difference.
What if my answers are rubbish?
Then we tell you — thin answers get flagged, not quietly built on. The autopsy is only as sharp as what you put in, so we'd rather bounce a weak answer back than hand you a weak read.
$97 for seven questions — really?
For seven forensic questions, graded, on your actual business, read by a human, that credit back to zero if you relaunch. An agency charges £3–5k and six weeks for the discovery phase alone. This is the sharp end of that, for $97, by return.
What happens after?
You get your read. If it points to a full rebuild and you want one, the $97 credits against it and you claim a relaunch slot. If it doesn't, nothing — no follow-up hard sell, no call you have to dodge.
The leaks are there whether you look or not

Turn "something's off" into "here's exactly what, and what it costs."

Every month you don't know where you're leaking, you're paying for it — in jobs you never hear about, customers who judged the shopfront and rang someone else. And if you fix it, the $97 was free.